This past week I came to New York to work with Full Figured Fashion Week. I will admit that I tried to get out of it. At first, I was excited that I was chosen to work with them despite the fact that I lived in Florida and the event would be held in New York. Life started throwing blows after another and I was literally fighting to stay afloat. It was too heavy so I had to confide in a few people. To be honest, I needed their prayers. It’s easy to be surrounded by a room full of people and nobody can see or feel your sorrows. This has been a skill that I have learned over the years to mask. I am so good at it to the point it becomes too heavy until I have to tell someone something. So here I am trying to put together a puzzle that I have no clue where the pieces are. I tried to back out of coming to New York but I kept receiving emails until the last day that was due for me to confirm that I could make it after I had already confirmed that I wouldn’t be attending. I figured that this trip was what I needed so I changed my mind and decided that I wouldn’t share about this trip.
I have no issues with getting in the room with anyone that I deem to be successful. However, it feels like when I get in the room, it doesn’t go any further because I shared things too soon with people who could really careless… Just for a couple superficial likes. I have nothing to prove! I owe it to myself to see the dreams unfold! I won’t discuss the details of this trip but it was the fuel that I needed to light a dimming flame. What do you do when your flame is dimming…find others whose flame is lit and find inspiration to rekindle your own flame.
My close friends and family are witnessing a miracle firsthand and don’t even know it. When God decided it’s time to move in my life and open major doors in my life, please understand it was not me at all. A part of me feels like I am chasing a dream that’s superficial and the other part is too passionate to give up.
This week has made me check myself; It reminded me of who I am and more importantly whose I am. Sometimes, I become timid like I am not GREAT! Not to be cocky but my skills will always speak for itself. It reminded me that if another black woman can do it then who am I that I can’ t! It also reminded me that my access has been granted and that I can get in the room, so I need to take ownership of it.
I hope this long post reminds someone to pick up every dream and go after it full force! Take ownership of your dreams and walk in the Godfidence that God has given you! He won’t lead you wrong or let you fall!